Hey Ladies! Happy FRI-YAY! I wrote this post a while back for my sweet friends at The Radiant Life Blog and thought today would be the perfect day to share it and Brian and I's wedding video with you!
To be honest, I felt completely under qualified to even be writing this post. My husband Brian and I have been married for two years on June 1st and in many ways I feel as though I have very little to bring to the table, BUT I am believing that whatever words God gives me He will use and bless! So my prayer is that this blesses, encourages, and spurs you and your spouse on in some way, shape or form.
Brian and I met in June of 2010, right before my last semester of college. When I met Brian I was in no way interested in dating him, or anyone for that matter. I had dated several guys throughout college and knew that I needed some time to just focus on my walk with the Lord. So, I put Brian off for two months before finally going on an ice-cream date. Not long after that first date we started dating. We dated for two years before getting engaged in October 2012 and then married in June of 2013.
The past two years have been such a gift. I can honestly say that I have grown more in my walk with the Lord over the past two years than ever before. Brian encourages me, prays for me and loves me well. Four things that I have personally learned are the importance of prayer, communication, teamwork, and intentional time together inside of marriage.
Prayer- Okay ladies, this one is HUGE! When I first met Brian I compared everything he did to my dad. Everything from his spiritual maturity, to what he ate. [I know, not a good idea!] But it is so easy to do, especially if you have been blessed with a Godly father. One thing I quickly realized is that I was comparing my dad’s 35 years of walking with Jesus to Brian’s 5. Thankfully I had Godly women in my life that pushed me to pray for and encourage him and let God do the rest! I am SO thankful that God allowed me to have a front row seat as he has molded and shaped Brian into a very Godly MAN! Your love and support will only go so far, but ultimately they need the power that only God can bring to their lives. Ask, "How can I be praying for you?" Pray for their heart, that God will refresh them with joy, peace, and love.
Communication- Communication is vital in any relationship, but especially marriage. He can’t read your mind ladies! So while your over they’re throwing a hissy fit or crying your eyes out, He is literally clueless. Now, I think another huge thing here is how you present/communicate your feelings to him. Remember that he is your brother in Christ and he isn’t going to be perfect. Cut him some slack and tell him how you are feeling. The more, the better! [Most of the time] I would rather over communicate what’s going through my head then under communicate. I tell Brian everything, unless it is just really stupid and pointless, and although it may annoy him at times it helps keep the lines of communication open.
Teamwork- Brian is literally my BIGGEST fan and I am his! I remember one night at dinner he asked me, “if you could do anything what would it be?” Then he proceeded to tell me to just message the girl I wanted to “be like” and ask her if I could pick her brain! I did not want to message her but then he asked me what I had to loose? So I messaged her and guess what? She said, lets talk tomorrow! So we did. She told me all about how she got started, etc. and now we talk on a regular basis! That’s just ONE example of how Brian supports me and pushes me to chase my dreams! Remember, you’re in this together and teamwork makes the dream work! ;)
Intentional Time Together- I believe in quality, intentional time with your spouse. In courtship the focus is on each other, but in marriage the focus tends to shift. One of the greatest enemies of romance is busyness. We have to set aside time and have boundaries! In fact, Brian and I believe in intentional time in marriage SO much, that we created a company that makes planning intentional time together a little easier! [Check out Datecrates.co]
So to sum it up, I want to leave you with a powerful quote from The Sacred Marriage. “Any situation that calls me to confront my selfishness has enormous spiritual value, and I slowly began to understand that the real purpose of marriage may not be happiness as much as it is holiness.” And that’s just it sisters. When Christ is the center, marriage will make us more like Jesus. Praying that over you.
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